The purpose of this blog is “how to get ahead when life sucks”, and while I normally try and be the cheerleader behind this project, frankly it’s been hard this last week.
When I took on the topic of bullying I was fired up and felt that I had the energy to do this. Good will always overcome the slightly less good, not totally evil, but definitely not looking out for others sort of good. Sadly, I didn’t anticipate HOW emotionally taxing it would be.
The topic of bullying was important to me because the bully is the nemesis of the underdog. The one who will do everything to keep the underdog, just that, under. Never helping others to get ahead, or at least ahead of the bully, the bully must always be at the front. In control of whatever the situation the bully feels vulnerable enough in to exert aggression and intimidation tactics. An effen’ black hole of suck.
What I found is that when we become adults, we no longer call bullies, bullies. Terminology has been relaxed, or rather, those who are more aggressive became more acceptable. Suddenly the new adult rules allow adults to treat each other as less, and somehow normal adults accept it. Adulthood has done a great job of normalizing bad things and blurring lots of edges.
It’s downright depressing sometimes.
Why so downtrodden oh fearless underdog person who doesn’t really lead us? Well there are many reasons. Reasons too great to go into here, but it has to do with bullies to some extent. While I was trying to stick up for fellow underdogs I somehow became caught in the cross-hairs of additional bullies. I was able to stand up for myself and what I truly believe is right…..
But I realized that I was the only one doing it.
It’s hard standing up to someone when there’s no one holding your legs. And there is the epic ongoing battle of the underdog isn’t it. Occasionally you’re going to have to fight a battle on your own, or a tussle, let’s call this more of a tussle, and there will be nobody to help you out. You’ll have to go it alone. You’re going to go in afraid sometimes.
The question you’ll have to ask yourself before you engage – Will you be ok with that Underdog?
In this instance I was ok with it, because bullying creates emotional complexities that not everyone can work through in enough time to be responsive. But you’ll have to deal with the emotional fallout like I am this week. The fallout being, damnit, I really wanted someone to say one good thing about me in that moment, where the hell were the people who were supposed to do that???
But that’s my ego speaking, and not the reality of life, especially as an underdog. But after I stood up for myself, I reset my boundaries, reminded myself, ON REPEAT, that there are many good people in this world even when the shadow of the bully hides most of them. Also, sleep, cats, silence.
Stay tuned while we continue on this road, we have a podcast coming up TOMORROW! We can’t be done because it’s too important of a topic to silence.
Keep on going Underdogs, the road is endless sometimes.