To say I’ve been in a funk lately is probably the understatement of the month, perhaps year. It’s probably been a good month since this funk happened, and we’re not talking about a good funk like cheese, we’re talking, damn what the hell is going on I can’t seem to find inspiration in anything type of funk. Hence, why you’ve also been hearing a lot of crickets on here (oh hey, we also re-branded….).
This funk has lead to a lot of questioning on the funk front – really wondering is This Underdog Life worth keeping up? Should I do something? Is it even helping? What advice I can possibly dispense to others, especially when I’m in such a funk myself? I have been plagued by a huge cloud of self-doubt. It started when we looked into bullying, and it just kept spiraling down, down, down….and it did not stop.
But today I had a break through in my funk. I mean – I was really analyzing this funk and asking myself, why am I in a funk? What the Funk is up with my Funk.
First, I know I need to get out of my own head and actively participate in non-work activities. So today I am going to plant some flowers in my garden, literally. It’s planting season and I like watching things grow; it helps me meditate in life and keep calm to see pretty things in front of me. That and cats. Maybe wine….Ok all of that.
Second, I need to find more women in my circle. I have great women in my circle yes, but our overlaps are few and far between. I’m in my 40’s, and I’m multiple careers in at this point. I’ve been laid off, divorced, moved cross country, re-married. My point in all this is I’ve had a lot of life. I need to find other women who have had a lot of life, and how they manage to find inspiration in their careers at this point and how they help others.
I feel like mid-level career women are hard to find; they keep to themselves. When I think of mid-level career women I can think of two women in my circle who fit that description. The rest are in their first career, and experiencing life circumstances for the first time. Perhaps there are more; but I haven’t met them and most LinkedIn connections do not count.
To be more concise; I need peers.
Having multiple voices from diverse backgrounds is important, but it’s equally important to find peer groups who can relate on a professional, and personal, level. Being able to relate to others helps reduce feelings of isolation, and can help situations like this where you’re at funk level 10.
I really need to hear about how women over 40 “survive” or what they do to keep growing. Where are my over 40 women at?
Part of starting Underdog wasn’t to be the sole giver of advice, but to show the vulnerable moments. Careers aren’t these neatly, plotted out charts that go exactly how you want them to; there are too many factors that you can’t predict. While you can mitigate some of the risks to a certain extent, you can’t control everything. You’re human. You’re an emotional creature. We have moments like this and you work through it, and you ask for help, and one day you’ll see the other side. I will see the other side of this funk; of that I am sure.
Embrace the messiness. But while you’re embracing it find those who can help you through the messiness. Now I’m going to go find a bunch of over 40 women and ask them to be friends.